New Do's

Don't they look great? Max, especially looks like a new little man. As for the before pics, I work with what I'm given.

Grateful

Our plans for Thanksgiving did not include going to Idaho. But, the closer the time came, the more I wanted to be present for Max's adoption finalization (the judge waived us having to be there in person) and the more homesick I was to go home.

I'm so grateful that Marcus booked us last minute flights, he's the man. It was a blessing we made our short connection and our flight made it in with the bad weather.

I'm so grateful we spent Thanksgiving with family.

And I'm most grateful for sweet, laid-back, handsome Max. He is a delight and he is officially ours. And next month he will be eternally ours. Awesome!

And I'm grateful this cat lived to see another day.

It Never Gets Easier

It was Ranch Rodeo time again. I have decided after living here 3 1/2 years it has never gotten easier to have family come and then say goodbye. In fact it seems to get harder each time. I have been completely homesick for 3 whole days. Sweet Lizzy and Max.We stuffed Damon boy full of sugar induced, gluten filled food. I better have established favorite Aunt status for a long while. Jenny Jo gave Max his first haircut!Papa Max and Grandma Becca with the kiddos.First snowstorm of the year. Wish I would have remembered to take a picture of the whole group, I didn't even get Wes, Jack and Debbie. Thanks for coming fam!!

When all else fails, distract.

When Zannah is doing something she shouldn't and you catch her, she begins talking to distract from the obvious. She does this umpteen times a day. For example, I catch her dumping soap out and she starts talking with hand gestures and throws some fake laughes in there like she is telling you a really funny story. In her mind, she now thinks you have overlooked her mess and everything is fine in the world.

I walked in the kitchen yesterday to find her crawling up onto the countertop to get to Max's formula, her latest obsession. We make eye contact and she instantly says, "You sleep good last night mommy?"

I start laughing and say, "What?"

She asks again, "You and Daddy sleep good last night?"

Now I'm laughing and I can't find the gumption to be firm with her. Clever little turkey.

Scary Story

Memory Monday~

Year 2000. Junior in highschool.

Background: Story takes place in the Malad Elementary which is an old two-story building. Malad Elementary rumors include: strange noises, lights seen flickering on and off at night, and a little girl dressed in white supposedly seen by teachers and janitors.

Jason, Alex, Bryan, Dusty(I can't remember who else) for easiness sake we will refer to them as the boys, approached the girls at school and asked if we could help them with a video project for one of their classes. We would do a "Dixie Chicks" music video and the boys would direct and film. My mom works at the Elementary and therefore could lend us the keys. The Elementary Auditorium was a must because we were super professional lip-synchers.

We met up at the school that evening. Lex tagged along in order to get some homework done in the quiet, aloneness of my mom's office. As I recall the girls consisted of Nicona, Sylvia, Tammy, Heather and myself. We wore our matching "Girls Kick *$#" shirts of course. Bryan and Dusty left to pick-up Kenny, who also was joining our free concert.

Tammy and Sylvia (who were doing their hair in the bathroom) came running and screaming onto the stage that they saw a little girl in white at the other end of the hall. The rest of us went out into the hall and saw nothing.

A little while later the little girl was seen again at the end of the hall. Because some of us hadn't see her yet, and were nervously certain they were joking, we linked arms and went to check it out. Sure enough, at the opposite end of the hall, was a glowing little girl in white. She just stood there looking at us. She then turned and seemed to disappear into the wall.

Chaos insued. We ran to the office where Lex was doing homework. Girls were screaming, crying, and threatening Jason and Alex that if this was a joke, they were dead. They promised it wasn't, and seemed reasonably scared themselves. Lex didn't believe us. Lex began to mock our story. He even whipped out his pocketknife and yelled, "Bring it on Little Girl!" Bravely or stupidly, we decided that we all would walk down the L-shaped hall and peer around the corner one last time to see if she was still there. We had to prove to Lex we weren't crazy.

With thumping hearts, wet armpits, and some wimpering protests, we linked arms and started down the hall. We peeked around the corner and there she stood. The ghostly being started walking towards us and we were done for.

Screaming and running as fast as we could, we bolted out the front doors and straight to our vehicles. Lex out ahead of the pack.

Before we left a mile of rubber on the pavement, we hear Jason laughing as he tries to explain that it was all a joke. The little girl was Bryan's niece. They had dressed her up in a white dress and put baby powder on her to give her a "glowing" appearance. When she seemed to disappear into the wall, she was really walking under the stairwell and hiding.

Brilliant. The boys had concocted the perfect practical joke. Totally unsuspecting, they lured us and our vanity in like a fly to a manure pile. The icing on the cake was unbeknownst to us, Jason had recorded the whole affair. Nicona in tears, Lynsey giving the same threat over and over again, Sylvia's blood-drained face, and Lex speedily dodging in and out of the crowd to be the first out the door. It also recorded Tammy punching Jason in the face or at least the sound effects.

The cherry on top occured the morning after, when this video was played for the entire highschool to see during 1st hour announcements.

(I can't remember every detail, so some names may be wrong. I should pull out the video and rewatch it, but I still get the willy-nillys just thinking about it.)

Our 10 year reunion is coming up this next summer. Wouldn't a brilliant revenge idea be fitting?

Just Pull My Teeth Out Already

I've decided that if you are potty-trained that means your mom is a saint. My mom is a saint 5 times over. If Zannah goes to Kindergarten in panties I'm going to tattoo saint across my forehead.

In three days, I have asked sweetly, patiently bit my tongue, ignored, demanded obedience, thrown toys across the room, locked myself in my room and cried. And prayed alot.

Bless her little heart, Z has some serious will-power. She holds her pee and poo from 7 in the morning until naptime when the pull-up comes on and then again after naptime til bedtime.

Candy doesn't tempt her. Balloons, park-time, popcorn, Curious George: all things she loves on a daily basis lose their bartering power once she figures out what I'm asking for in exchange. Who is this girl? She seriously says "no thank you" to candy when I ask if she will sit on the toilet and try.

It may sound like she isn't ready to be potty-trained yet (I don't buy it), and maybe after a few more days I'll throw in the towel, but I have a few teeth left to yank.


Quote of the day: I was telling Zannah that it was bedtime and she needed to get her blanket and bunny. And she responded with, "Yes sir!" That has Marcus written all over it.

Halloweeny Time

Z and her buddy Tyson were Salt and Pepper. This is the best picture I got. They look so happy to be alive. I didn't get a picture of Max's first costume, which was a navy marine. He spit up all over it. I'm happy we put him in the banana outfit, maybe this will be a when it's your "first halloween" costume tradition. I participated and lost in a pie eating contest and shamed our family name. Cool whip pies are disgusting.

Goings On

Marcus is in the holy lands for work. The lucky, lucky boy swam in the dead sea just this morning.

We have survived a week without him only because this lovely lady came to play.


My no-nap idea flew out the window after only one day and my guilt went with it :)

I was informed the other day that some ladies I know describe me as "granola". It makes me wonder if my air-dried hair, make-up free face, bra-less (not all the time mom), subaru-driving ways are labeling me. As long as "tree-hugger" wasn't associated with it, I took it as a compliment.

I have never met a more chill baby than Max. He is pure delight.

And he has just found his toes.


And I'll end with funny Zannah statements. That girl tries my patience to no end only because her headstrong ways rub my headstrong ways the wrong way. How I love her!

"See ya next time" when she lays down for a nap.
"It's dangerous out there" when she doesn't want me to leave the room.
"But, I love you!" when she gets put in time-out.
"Oooohhh Max, you so cute."

I Love Naps

Although, I am determined not to take one today. Even though both kids are sleeping at the same time. Well, Max is sleeping and Zannah is locked in her room. What she does during her naptimes are her business I've decided.

I wish I wasn't so addicted to napping. I wake up in the morning and think "you can do it, only 6 hours until naptime." I've convinced my body that it needs a nap. That if I don't get a nap, something scary will happen about 5 o'clock. But, this week I'm going to prove it wrong.

And eventually, no napping will turn into going to bed at a decent hour because I'm super tired, which will then turn into rising early happily, right?

Stinking Cute

Changes

Most of the time change is good. But this time it was not good, it was bad, like cry-your-eyes out bad. These two moved away. And H-town is not close to A-town....Texas is way too big!

Zannah moved to a big-girl bed. (Just last night!) And Max into the crib instead of the playpen.

Although these two can never be left unattended in the same vincinity, Z is acquiring a much gentler touch. A much appreciated change.

Can summer really be over? Although it is still blasted hot most days, there is a nip in the air some evenings and I can feel fall coming. Zannah has become quite the little swimmer this summer. We moved into a different house only 2 miles from the old one, so the move wasn't too bad, but we couldn't have done it without these two. There is no doubt where Marcus gets his work ethic from!

I didn't think I would be so sad to say goodbye to this particular house. Like my mom says, it's not the house, but the memories. So true, wise one, so true. Truth be told, we liked the house, but strongly disliked being sandwiched in there like sardines and being boxed in on all sides by yappy dogs. I talked Marcus out of throwing anti-freeze soaked steaks over the fence many times the past 3 years.

Altough there have been changes, some things don't change. Like Z's love for her friend Ty-Ty. Shortly after this pic was taken, she took a spill on the sidewalk. A goose-egg on the noggin isn't enough to change her thrill-seeking ways.

Smiley Boy

Max is 3 months old. At about 10 weeks he went from sleeping 3 hour spans to 10 hours at night. For that, I would give him candy right now if he would take it. He is also smiling and it is absolutely adorable. He knows how to put on the charm for Grandmas. (Dana--less than a week! Hopefully these pics will tide you over.) And I'm pretty sure he hasn't lost one single hair of his lustrous mane.

Daily Downlow

I can't stop watching these videos.




I took Zannah and Max to the mall and UPS store by myself and it was amazing! I wasn't in a rage or near tears and Zannah didn't run out in front of any cars. She walked by me and didn't cry or whine when we left the play area. It was heaven.

My name is Lynsey. I am no longer under child-induced house arrest and I'm a Mormon.

When "thank you" isn't enough

I've been thinking a lot about Max's and Zannah's birthmoms. About how there aren't words to amply express my gratitude or love for them. We spent time in the hospital with both of them and were there to hug them goodbye as both babies were placed in our arms for good. But, a hug and a thank-you were hugely inadequate.

With Zannah, I was so anxious to get her and so scared after holding her that the whole thing might still fall through, I selfishly and secretly couldn't wait to say goodbye to Peggy. As we spent the 48 required hours in the hospital, Marcus would kick my foot and give me the look, which meant I needed to let others hold Zannah and I grudgingly complied. Peggy and her family were so accomodating to us and so gracious, yet I was stressed and impatient. I know much of it can be attributed to being a first time mom--I didn't want anyone but me to hold Zannah for the first 6 months! But, I still wish I had been better. After bringing Zannah home, I remember asking my Aunt Carol, who also has adopted, if she was happy that she didn't know the birthmoms. She said she would give anything to give them a hug and tell them thank you. I thought she was crazy, it seemed nice to just pick up a baby at the hospital, no strings attached.


By the time Max came around, my heart had changed. I would give anything to have hugged Peggy a little tighter and have loved her a little more.


As soon as I met Anastasia, I loved her. The 34 hours we spent with her weren't enough. She held Max as much as she wanted without me hovering over. I wasn't a basketcase, I wasn't stepping out into the hall to cry or wishing the time away. I am so grateful Heavenly Father gave me a chance to do better the second time around.

We recently recieved a sweet letter from Anastasia, I cried as I read it. What incredible women both of our birthmothers are. How blessed Zannah and Max are to come from a love so unselfish and so pure. And even though thank you isn't enough, I'm so glad I was able to say it face to face.

Should be

A lot of days I am very unmotivated. I should be:

doing dishes

packing (we sold our house you know)

preparing this months sharing times

cleaning and sorting through all this stuff we have accumulated

folding clothes

sleeping (it's midnight)

but instead I'm watching HGTV and dipping strawberries in white chocolate and reading blogs and counting down the hours until my mommy gets here and then she can stand over me with a whip and maybe I'll get something done.

She's Handy With a Knife

This explains a lot. I thought I was going crazy when I would find her in rooms I was sure I had locked.

Say What.....Take 2

Conversation at my visiting teaching appointment this past week.



Visitee: "Do you have a partner?"



Me: My face turns red as my mind contemplates what she is implying. "Um, yes. His name is Marcus and he is at work right now......." And then I mumble something about "we" being married.



Some awkward silence.



Visitee: "I meant a visiting teaching partner. I figured you had a husband if you adopted through LDS services."



What in the koo-hay was my mind thinking? That this near 70 year old lady was asking if I was a lesbian or living with my boyfriend? Next month I'm going to do the question asking.

Maxee

Zannah has now dropped "Baby Max" and moved on to Maxee, much to Marcus's dismay. I always think you can't love them anymore than when they are newborns, yet I do.

We still can't bring ourselves to cut his hair, even though he needs it. I vow to cut it before it gets too mullet-ish.

Max occasionally smiles, mostly when he is dozing off. He has yet to last more than 3 hours before needing to eat again, I think we were spoiled with Zannah's early sleeping habits.

He was 12 lbs and 23 inches at his 2 month check-up. The doctor proclaimed him perfect today, but that we already knew.

The Fourth

We spent the 4th in Colorado with almost all of the Gilleland clan. Homemade rootbeer, homemade ice cream, cotton candy, flag raising, games, tie dye shirts, late nights, mountain ranch, horny toads, and FAMILY. My favorite part was Grandad telling us about his life and his ancestors.

And Z still loves those big dogs.

The White Ghost

Memory Monday~

I started writing this Monday for Father's Day, but didn't get it done.

I would have to spend a large amount of time to describe my dad and I still wouldn't do it justice. He is quiet. He is a cowboy. He is a hardworker. When you are talking to him on the phone, sometimes you aren't sure if he is still there because it takes him so long to answer your questions. He is patient. He loves my mom. He holds his tongue.....too bad I didn't inherit that trait. Did I mention that he is quiet?? When he is sitting, his leg is always bouncing, unless he's asleep. I used to love to lay on his lap at church and have my head vibrate on his knee.

I specifically remember him coming in from the barn one night, the chain he had used to pull a calf with, draped from on side of his long johns to another like a gangster and dancing across the family room floor. He has a good sense of humor.

During my teen years, our house got toilet papered a fair amount. It was the fun thing to do to your friends, or so I thought. It soon became apparent that the T.P.ers weren't trying to get the attention of the adolescents in the house. They were thrill seekers. They had nicknamed my dad the "white ghost" and the "white ghost" never disappointed. The dogs would start barking and dad would peek out the window to see strands of white paper being flung over tree limbs. He would grab his shotgun, sneak out the front door in nothing but his skivvies and blast away. Straight up in the air, of course.

Happy Father's Day Dad. I sure love you.

Life in the quick lane

Have I ever mentioned that Z likes to run?? Any opportunity, any time of day, any place. If you take your eye off her for a second, she is 4 houses down knocking on a door. In Idaho, she was in the barnyard in a flash or out in the alfalfa field and once halfway down to the neighbors (1/2 mile away). Currently she swipes items (bracelets, toys, shoes) from kids in nursery just to get them to chase her. I've been told one Sunday all 7 toddlers were chasing her trying to recover lost property.

It is a little terrifying now, but give it a couple years and that energy could easily save her from ever getting caught in kissing tag at school, or maybe earn a highschool cross country title, but we have our hopes on the Ironman. Determination, endurance, strong thighs.....she's got it.

(Taken at a pitstop somewhere New Mexico)

Papa Tom

Life with Two

Is a little bit crazy.

Day 1
I catch Zannah carrying Max around the living room. (No more leaving him on chairs or couches or floors)

Day 2

Max is sleeping in the playpen and Zannah decides to shower him with her toys and coins and random picture frames.

Day 3

I hear Zannah giggling as she is feeding Max a fifty cent piece.

Day 4

Z climbs on couch in order to jump into the playpen with Max.

But, we are finding that Max is tough and Zannah is so darn in love with him it's cute...... and a tad scary.